Or do I have surgery later on in life and hope it wouldn’t get any worse?
I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t eat. It was all I thought about. I was terrified and I just didn’t know what to do for the best.
It was worse because I knew that only I could make this decision.
A stressful time
Eventually, after months of research, tears and stress, I decided on the surgery.
I knew that it would be difficult and a long recovery, but I knew if I didn’t go through with it, my back would continue to deteriorate with age.
I don’t think I could have made this decision with the support of others on the forum, as reading their experiences and seeing their surgery photos and how well they were doing after surgery made the whole thing seem less scary.
I was scared of the unknown.
I knew it was highly unlikely, but I couldn’t stop worrying that something would go wrong and that I’d end up worse off than I was, maybe paralysed – how would my family and I cope?
I felt selfish for putting my family through all this stress too and would often cry myself to sleep.
It was always in the back of my mind.
What on earth was I doing?!
I had scoliosis surgery in 2010 and blog about my experiences living with scoliosis. My aim is to raise awareness of scoliosis and help and inspire others with the condition.